Monthly Archives: February 2014

I need to know…

…if you’re for real or if it’s just an illusion of my mind. You’re making me crazy and I don’t want to get involved that much because you’re gonna hurt me. I need to know if you’re in this just as much as me, because if you are then I won’t have a problem to start getting more and more together. I need an answer. This is making me insane. I want you so bad. Tell me you want me and I’m all yours.

Little Miss Sunshine


I think this movie is just fantastic, I’ve learnt that being yourself and not caring what others thought about you was the real way to get to be someone free and independent, no one has the power to change who you are.
Each time there was a scene when they have to get into the car was hilarious, it’s a great dysfunctional family that gets to tag along pretty well by the end when they accept the other how just is.
Be yourself be Bhaltair.

At a loss of words

The realisation I just had talking with whom was one of my best friends since I was 6, it is… indescribable. I don’t know what to say to her, I’ve lost my trust on her because of the space we’ve been putting between us. I’m at a loss of words with her and it’s sad because we know each other since always. We’ve been through a lot together and we’ve always supported the other one, but three years ago we went different ways and from that moment we haven’t been what we were. We’ve lost that friendship and now we don’t consider each other friends but worst, we don’t even talk that frequently. I know there’s probably no turning back and this will go worst from here but… I wish things would have been different. However, I won’t forget all those years we spent together.
Be yourself be Bhaltair.

Dance at night…

Everything starts with a smile and our eyes meet. You say something to your friend and I pretend to look at something in my phone. I see you laughing with your friend and I think maybe it’s about me. Then your friend comes to me and asks me to dance and I say yes just to continue the story and see your reaction. The song ends and I stop dancing. We all sit and cheer and when I finished my drink you come to me, smile and I smile back at you like a fool. Then you extend your hand at me and I feel like smiling more. You ask me if I wanted to dance and I feel silly for not take your hand right when you extend it, but you still ask and I say yes in a low tone that you almost missed. We dance,  well more I follow you because I’m too nervous to dance properly and you laugh when I say it aloud. After dancing 3 songs, which I don’t know but I don’t really care about, you give me another drink to cheer with you and to get less nervous. My friends tell me that you are interested in me and I laugh because that’s what happens to me too and it’s almost absurd. I look at you and you smile and I laugh because I don’t really believe what my friends say. A few minutes later you extend your hand again and I don’t doubt it this time. I take your hand and while we’re dancing we talk and maybe, just maybe I start to think that it’s true what my friends say. You ask me if I have a boyfriend, I say no and ask you the same and you doubt but say no. I feel like missing something though I don’t care. Everything change when someone tell me you have a girlfriend, but you don’t really like her. That’s when all change. I start to dance more provocatively that way you will feel more attracted to me. Then you ask for my number and I give it to you knowing that you probably won’t use it. We say goodbye, you make your way home and I make mine. At home I think about all that happens and feel asleep hoping to see you again.
Be yourself be bhaltair.